I get the feeling it's becoming more and more commercial and everyone feels obligated to spend money just because it's February 14th. So I'm wondering if it's still a real tradition or just something stores made up to sell stuff.
The key thing is doing what works for you, not what you feel forced to do. You're right to ask the question because Valentine's Day is this weird mix of an actual historical tradition (the whole thing with saints and love letters in the Middle Ages) and a modern commercial machine. Shops clearly take advantage of it, but that doesn't mean you have to follow along just because February rolls around.
If you're in a relationship and you both want to do something special, it doesn't need to be expensive or conventional. You could do something personal, a nice dinner for two, write a letter, or just not do much and talk to your partner about whether you're actually into it. What matters is that you're on the same page, not doing what everyone else does.
Honestly, the couples who handle it best are usually the ones who joke about it together and decide together if they feel like it or not. There's no universal obligation to spend more money on February 14 than any other day. If you think it's too commercial and forced, that's a totally valid signal. That said, if your partner really does care about doing something, that's a conversation to have - but without any guilt trips.
You don't have to follow the calendar if it doesn't work for you. What actually works well is decoupling Valentine's Day from spending: you can do something personal on a different day of the year, when prices drop and you find more original stuff. That lets you show you care about someone without playing along with the February 14th marketing game, and honestly it often makes more of an impact than a gift you panic-buy a week before.
The trap is that if you completely refuse to participate, it can create tension with your partner who might have actually cared about the day. You don't need to spend a fortune, but completely ignoring the date risks coming across as indifference. Something simple and personal costs nothing and changes the whole vibe compared to a flat-out refusal. It's more about the symbolism than the commercial side if you do it the right way.
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