Set up an automatic payment to clear your full balance a few days before the due date, and you've basically solved the whole problem. I do this with mine and it's worked great since I got my first card a couple years ago. The autopay takes the willpower out of it - you don't have to remember, you don't have to resist the temptation to carry a balance, it just happens. That's your foundation.
Here's the practical thing nobody really talks about though: pick a card with a cashback structure that matches how you actually spend money. I travel a lot for road trips and vet tech continuing education stuff, so I use a card with solid gas and hotel rewards. My friend uses one for groceries since that's her biggest expense. If you get a generic 1.5% cashback card but you never eat out or travel, you're leaving value on the table while paying an annual fee. Look at your last few months of spending and match the card's rewards to that, not to what sounds coolest.
The real danger your friends probably ran into wasn't carrying a small balance - it's treating available credit like free money and spending beyond their actual means. So yeah, the monthly payoff matters, but the actual guardrail is only charging stuff you genuinely need or things you've already budgeted for. Think of it as a payment method, not a loan. If you'd hesitate to buy it with cash from your checking account, don't put it on the card. Combine that discipline with the autopay setup and you're looking at clean credit history plus reward money without any of the stress.