Based on your experience, I'd recommend taking a **spare tube** above all else - honestly, that's your best insurance! The others have a point, but I wouldn't put too much stock in a patch kit. Sure, in theory patching sounds great, but when you're out on the road and panicking, the chances are pretty high you won't get it right anyway. With a new tube you skip all the stress and get back on the bike way faster!
What else should be in there: a decent mini pump (those foldable things are pretty useless, get one with real pressure instead!), tire levers to remove the tire, and maybe a few spare patches in case your tube gets a flat too. A multitool with hex keys is handy too, in case something on the frame needs adjusting. As for the patch kit itself: the sandpaper dries out over time and the glue hardens - if you're not checking it regularly, you won't be able to use it in an emergency anyway!
Honestly, the best strategy is to do a quick check before you ride: check tire pressure, look for thorns or splinters stuck in the tire. Then the odds of a flat are pretty low, and even if it happens, you'll get home no problem with a spare tube!