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A lot also depends on how you were evaluated in childhood - if you were constantly criticized or given conditions ("I love you if you're a straight-A student"), then as an adult you keep demanding perfection from yourself, because that's the only way you feel worthy. Self-acceptance begins when you understand that your worth doesn't depend on how good you are at something, and your flaws are just a part of who you are, not a reason to reject yourself.
Often it comes from having too high expectations of yourself, or from paying too much attention to your flaws instead of noticing your strengths. Self-acceptance comes with time, when you realize that perfect people don't exist and your shortcomings are just part of who you are, not a sentence hanging over you.
I think the problem isn't always about having too-high expectations - sometimes it's the opposite, we're afraid to accept ourselves because we think that if we stop being critical of ourselves, we'll slack off and get worse. Like self-criticism is the only thing keeping us in shape. But actually, people who are gentler with themselves often achieve more because they don't get stuck in self-flagellation, they just work on what isn't working out. Accepting your flaws doesn't mean throwing your hands up, it's just a realistic view of yourself.
I noticed that when you rearrange furniture or do home renovations, you always see only the flaws at first - like here I nailed something crooked, there the paint dripped. And then you can spend hours redoing the little things instead of enjoying the result. It's the same with yourself: your brain got stuck in error-detection mode because that once helped us survive. But now it's just a habit that poisons your life. The main thing is to realize that your flaws don't make you worse, they're just part of the package, like your strengths are.
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