He sits at the PC right after school and plays until 10 p.m., sometimes even longer. I've tried setting rules, but that just leads to arguments. His grades are still okay, but I'm worried it might get out of hand. Other parents say that's normal for boys his age, but it just seems like too much to me.
Right after school until 10 pm and beyond is pretty intense - that's easily 6-7 hours on a normal day, plus probably weekends too. The problem isn't really Fortnite itself, but that he can't control himself and then you're the bad guy when you set boundaries. Don't try to have total control, but set clear time limits instead (like max until 9 pm on school nights, then it's done) and explain to him specifically why: sleep is important, his eyes need breaks, and gaming constantly makes you unhappy in the long run. If he sticks to the time, there's less drama than if you have to renegotiate every single day.
Just because other parents say it's normal doesn't mean it's good for your son - a lot of people just go along with whatever everyone else is doing. 6-7 hours daily is way too much, especially if he jumps straight into it after school without a break. Instead of setting rules and then getting into fights about it, I'd talk it through with him - ask him why he needs to play so much, whether he's stressed about school or feeling pressured by his friends. Then you can figure out together what makes sense (maybe 1-2 hours on school days?), rather than just banning it outright.
You'll probably get further with fixed times instead of open discussions - so don't negotiate, but set something like "no gaming after 8pm, period" and stick to it, even if it causes some friction at first. The initial arguments are normal and will pass, but if you give in, he'll just learn that whining works. 6-7 hours daily is really a lot for a 14-year-old, and that goes beyond "normal for guys his age" - your concern is justified, even if his grades are still okay. Maybe it helps if you two think together about what he could do instead (sports, hanging out with friends), without making it feel like a punishment.
6-7 hours a day is simply too much, and experts agree on that. Your gut feeling is right, and it's not about whether other parents let their kids do it - it's about your son. At that age, he needs physical activity, sleep, and other activities, or he'll run into real problems with concentration, sleep, and later with his mental health too.
The core issue: you're trying to negotiate right now, and that doesn't work with this kind of addictive behavior. With a 14-year-old, you need to set clear boundaries - not discuss, just do it. Something like "PC is off at 9 PM, done" or "maximum 2 hours on school days". Yeah, there'll be fights, but that's part of the process. Important thing: the boundaries have to be really consistent, even if he complains or ignores you.
Try to figure out at the same time why he's getting so into it. Is it social pressure (all his friends play), or is he running away from something else? Depending on that, it might also make sense to look for something else together that he enjoys. But the rule still has to stand - that's not negotiable.
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