We've been together for almost 3 years and my partner wants us to move in together next year. I have doubts because I've never lived with anyone other than my family and I'm a bit scared. How long should a couple be together before taking that step?
There's no exact right time because every couple is different, but 3 years is already plenty of time to know each other well and figure out if living together makes sense. What matters is that you're both ready, not just that a certain amount of time has passed - so instead of focusing on whether you need more or less time, ask yourself if you've already worked through those doubts about living with someone. One way to test it is to spend several days in a row at your partner's place and see how it feels, or have a real conversation about how you both imagine daily life together (chores, money, personal space). If you're still scared after that, it's okay to tell your partner you need more time; if you realize it's more fear of the unknown than real doubts about the relationship, it's probably worth trying.
3 years is more than enough time, the real problem is that you're scared and that's legitimate, but is that fear specifically about living with her or more about stepping out of your comfort zone? Because those are different things. If the relationship is going well, sometimes you just have to trust the process a bit and see how it feels once you're already sharing space, even if it's weird at first.
Three years is quite a long time, but the "right moment" depends less on a calendar than on whether you're both psychologically ready and have actually talked about concrete things: how you handle money, what happens if one of you wants more space, how you divide household chores. Your fear is completely normal and it's not a reason to say no, but it is a sign that you need to have a serious conversation with your partner about your specific concerns before you move in together. Sometimes the problem isn't "being together for X amount of time" but rather having sorted out the practical details that end up causing friction later.
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