I've been seeing someone I matched with on Tinder for 3 months now. At first it was just physical attraction, but now we're actually spending real time together and I'd like to know if this is love or if I'm just confusing it with that good feeling you get after spending quality time with someone. Do you guys have a method to tell the difference?
It's not an exact science, but the real difference is that you start wondering about their future, not just yours. If you spontaneously think of stuff they'd like, if you worry about them when things aren't going well, if you want to make plans together in 6 months or a year, that's not just chemistry. Chemistry fades pretty quick once it dies down, but feelings settle in gradually and they're there even when you're not doing anything special together.
Chemistry is intense but it fades fast, so give yourself a few more months before you make any conclusions. What I notice with people around me is that real love isn't so much about the big questions about the future - it's more about how you act when things get boring or tedious. Like, can you two just hang out watching a show together without it being weird, or do you quickly find an excuse to leave? Also pay attention to whether you think about him spontaneously when you're doing random stuff, not just when you're together.
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